1 - (SYM 40) Can Relationships Be Fun?: Insights from Gen Z

In our work, we have identified three major pillars of relationship success: (a) being able to communicate well about sensitive topics without getting into negative interaction patterns (b) understanding and nourishing commitment in the relationship both in terms of having a long-term view and investing in the relationship over time and (c) having strong positive connections (fun, friendship, sensuality and sex).  We have found that couples generally start at very high levels in the relationship on these factors, that often diminish over time as they are eroded by mismanaged negative emotions, conflict, and benign neglect, such as not making time for positive connections and protecting that time from conflict. Given the strong association between relationship quality and individual well-being, we also have examined a set of variables that reflect individual well-being including personal happiness, engaging in hookups, and attachment style.

In this presentation, we present data from over 1000 Gen Z participants culled from over 20 independent samples who provided measures of communication quality, negative interaction patterns, levels of commitment, and how much fun they are having in their relationship, as well as several individual functioning measures. Preliminary results on couple factors from one of these surveys indicate that partners who rate their relationship as very happy, compared to those who do not, report having a lot of fun together (78% vs, 36%), lower rates of destructive conflict (19% vs. 36%), and higher rates of sensual/sexual satisfaction (69% vs. 45%).  Preliminary findings on individual factors indicate that partners who rate their relationship as very happy, compared to those who do not, report being less likely to engage in hookups (14% vs. 28%), higher rates of secure attachment (71% v. 45%), and lower rates of reporting very low personal happiness (5% vs. 18%).  In future analyses, we will test the hypothesis that for people in relationships headed for distress, the major correlate of relationship discord will be the inability to handle conflict, the best predictor of couples who become happy will be the amount of positive connections.   We discuss implications of these findings for relationship science, couples relationship education programs, and couples therapy for younger couples.